You have stared into my soul precisely twice;

And that is apparently all it takes,

Because that’s all it took.



I thought we met in spring,
but it was already autumn.
Your affections fell away
to rot around me;
plucked by the cooling wind.
My novelty faded
with the first breath of winter’s night;
Familiar streetlights guide me back
to my lonesome world.


In this building of nurses insisting I press the bell and let them help, the panic attack plays through without witness.

A midnight delivery scares the birds out of the trees and into the sky; free and flying and soon they will be calm.

Another minute passes. Another moment closer to morning. Another cry down the hallway from a man who doesn’t know what morning is. 


An exercise in recognising strength
began with waking in a pool of sweat;
With a throat full of bile,
And a heart full of terror.

I killed four people last night.
I remember the tearing muscle
as I ripped the jaw off one;
The way I was hunted;
The way I was found;

The laughter.
The anticipation.
My own jaw.
My own tendons.
Their revenge.

And this morning-
I dressed and cooked and cleaned;
I brushed some dogs;
I wrote another thousand I’ll probably never publish.

I laughed a little.
My body count is long lost;
Maybe somewhere with my mind.